Don’t sacrifice your access to pleasure in the patently false belief that sexual satisfaction will find you when you are fitter or more beautiful. In actuality, studies have shown the reverse to be true: opening yourself up to more sexual pleasure will make you recognize the beauty in your body as it is and inspire you to treat it better.
Fetish Friday: Temperature Play
What melts your butter?
If you fool around with Temperature Play, you’re going to find out. Why? Because this is a type of sensual play where heat and cold are used to intensify physical sensations.
Some like it hot. For them, drizzle warmed chocolate, wax, honey, caramel, or oil all over your body (or theirs) to get in the mood.
Others like to chill. For them, grab some ice, whipped cream, or frozen fruit and use it to elicit major goosebumps.
Fetish Friday: Chrysophilia
Love gold? Wish you could dip something (or someone) in gold and use it for pleasure? If gold or golden objects get you all hot and bothered, you’re into chrysophilia.
Formicophilia is sex play with ants. Or, more specifically, it’s enjoying the sexual sensation of ants or bugs crawling or nibbling on your genitals. So, formicophiliacs won’t be the ones moving the picnic blanket to get away from the bugs. They’ll be the ones who are totally fine with ants in their pants.
When I have sex, I don’t just get off on my own kinks and my own pleasure. I also get off on my partner’s pleasure. The sight, the sound, the feel, of someone in my bed who’s getting excited and getting off… that’s hot. It’s not particularly selfless or noble of me — it’s just hot. The more I care about someone, the more true that is… And if you can’t get off on the sight and sound and feel of your partner’s pleasure — even if what you’re doing isn’t your particular favorite thing — then what the hell are you doing in a sexual / romantic relationship?