College Week, Day 3: BedsiderATX On Feminism and Pornography at ‘Week of Women’
As part of College Week, we asked our ambassadors what their most memorable events were this past year. Here’s what the Longhorns at BedsiderATX remembered best.
Everything really is bigger in Texas, including Bedsider tabling events.
Women are an important part of Bedsider, which meant participating in the Texas Orange Jackets’ Week of Women was both fun and meaningful for the BedsiderATX team. Week of Women occurs every year, March 18th through 22nd, on the Texas campus as a celebration of womanhood. The theme reads “Inform, Empower, and Celebrate” and, to put these themes into action, the Orange Jackets (OJs) set up events all week to inform the University student body about women in modern society.
In addition to letting BedsiderATX in on the fun, OJs paired with: Texas Union Theater to kick off the week with a screening of Bridesmaids, Voices Against Violence (VAV) for their production of “Get Sexy, Get Consent”, Professor Robert Jensen for a discussion about pornography and masculinity at the Tejas house, and The Vagina Monologues. In addition to this, the OJs held a Texas Tea Party on the Main Campus lawn and a panel entitled “Can Women Have it All?” with several local female leaders. BedsiderATX was lucky enough to participate in The Texas Tea Party, the Tejas discussion, and The Vagina Monologues.
Without a doubt, the most intriguing part of the week was Dr. Jensen’s discussion. The event was cozy and close, with an almost tangible sense of inclusion and wonder. Jensen hit on hot topics such as the rampant sexualization of women in the pornography industry and the paradox of masculinity in modern American society. Most notable was his appeal to the men of the audience to adopt the feminist viewpoint both as an antidote to the impossibility of portraying the stereotypical male bravado and as a stepping stone to the solution of gender imbalances in society. A feminist himself, Professor Jensen illustrated the ills of the social and internal disenfranchisement of both sexes and the need for equal standing—not just as a verbose claim, but as an actualization.
BedsiderATX was present as a representative of contraceptive empowerment and a source of information for women (and men!) present at this event. It was an experience that we were more than happy to be a part of, and we remain hopeful that there will be more of these kinds of discussions across college campuses and beyond.
Yes, it can be hot to star in your own private sex tape with someone you’re attracted to. Yes, it can feel harmless because you trust this person and believe it’ll never be seen by anybody else. But life happens. And when you create something that can be shared, stolen, found, used against you, sold, and/or viewed by anyone, you are at risk for exposure. Intimate, WTF-was-I-thinking exposure.
From yesterday’s Frisky Friday, “Lights! Camera! Action! Is making a sex video ever a good idea?”
We’re all about the sexy adventures (especially on Sexy Saturday), but documenting it for future viewing is where we recommend drawing the line. Anyway, read our take and please do share yours in the comments.
Porn actresses were more likely to identify as bisexual, first had sex at an earlier age, had more sexual partners, were more concerned about contracting a sexually transmitted disease (STD), and enjoyed sex more than the matched sample, although there were no differences in incidence of CSA. In terms of psychological characteristics, porn actresses had higher levels of self-esteem, positive feelings, social support, sexual satisfaction, and spirituality compared to the matched group.
Fetish Friday: Pictophilia
“All art is erotic.” —Gustav Klimt
Klimt’s famous painting “The Kiss” is considered erotic art, but we’re not sure it would satisfy a Pictophiliac. They may prefer a racier wing at the museum.
Why? Because Pictophilia is a sexual attraction to erotic art that’s typically a bit more x-rated, like Shunga netsuke (carvings of couples copulating); 1st century pornographic pottery from Peru; or any piece from the World Erotic Art Museum.
Curious? Want to see more sexually-charged art? You’re only a click away from a NSFW field trip to the online World Museum of Erotic Art.
And most importantly, with regard to any and all activities, if it doesn’t taste delicious, don’t swallow.
Barb Stuckey, “Why Eating Should Be More Like Sex.” (Huffington Post)
And our second-favorite quote from the article:
Sex is, of course, a tactile experience. Yet our enjoyment of it comes from the combination of visual, sound, smell and taste inputs. If you have trouble imagining how our eyes impact our sensuality, all you have to do is consider that porn accounts for 30% of all internet traffic. We use visual images to stimulate ourselves. Having sex in the dark employs only 80% of our sensory apparatus. Maybe that’s why my earliest experiences were so unsatisfying.
We similarly stimulate ourselves with food. After watching a gorgeous, natural light-kissed cookbook video eight times in one day, I realized my behavior was veering dangerously close to a food porn addiction. You cookbook readers out there hanging your heads in shame know exactly what I’m talking about. Yet we also cheat ourselves with food. We eat while watching TV, which is somewhat worse than eating in the dark (which I’ve done and write about in my book) because it occupies the brain as well as the eyes. True food appreciation requires undistracted use of the brain in addition to all five of the senses.
Tuesday resolution: Lights on for sex, TV off for meals. Advice to live by.
Pay attention to me! How to deal when the focus isn’t on you
Ever feel like you’re competing with work, friends, porn, sports, or a needy ex girlfriend for your partner’s attention? Check out our latest Frisky Friday and let us know: how do you deal with feeling neglected?
Designer Vaginas - Is There Such Thing as a Perfect Pussy?
Originally published on SexReally.com on January 11, 2011.
We all know plastic surgery is no stranger to the porn industry—think size DDD boobs—but recent trends indicate that more women outside the industry are looking to nip-tuck their lady parts as well. Labiaplasty and other cosmetic surgical procedures including vaginoplasty and hoodectomies are becoming more mainstream—in fact, some doctors are calling it “the new nose job.” Women are going under the knife to boost their genital self-esteem and sex lives.
Labia (inner and outer lips) surgery can be used to make the genitals symmetrical if one lip is larger than the other, but most surgeries are done to decrease the size of the labia minora and/or labia majora to create a “prettier pussy.” Vaginal rejuvenation, also known as vaginoplasty, is the tightening of the vagina. A hoodectomy exposes the clitoris by removing the clitoral hood in order to increase sexual pleasure. Hymen reconstruction, also referred to as “revirginizing,” reconstructs the hymen to restore the appearance of virginity. Other genital surgeries include liposuction of the mons pubis or labia majora, clitoral repositioning, and G-spot amplification (injected collagen which swells the area). One word comes to my mind when I think of any of these surgeries—OUCH!
A British television show called Embarrassing Bodies showed a woman stating she had a disfigurement so bad she feared she might never find a man who would love her. What did she think was a disfigurement? She had slightly larger than average labia. Lady parts—like any other body part—come in all different shapes, colors and sizes. So where are women getting the idea that they are horribly disfigured because of larger labia? The messages are coming from media and in particular pornography. Plastic surgeons are cashing in on women’s low self-esteem. In an article in the Metro Times titled “Does this make my labia look fat?” the author mentions that women have already nipped, tucked, implanted, and vacuumed every other part of their bodies and are now turning their perfection-obsessed eyes to their own genitals. These surgeries are being marketed as empowering women, but at the same time they are sending a message that to be desirable women should have a youthful vulva and tight vagina.
Several studies suggest that women seek out genital surgeries after seeing digitally altered nude pictures of women with smaller, tighter genitals in pornography. The presence of crotch shots in magazines and pornography has made women more aware of their vulvas and caused them to compare their vulvas to an ideal look. In a Los Angeles Times article investigating the topic, Judy Norsigian, co-founder of Our Bodies, Ourselves, says that women who have these surgeries are taking risks in order to adhere to an ideal beauty standard that is dictated by a society in which men are fixated on barely legal girls.
Dr. Matlock, a plastic surgeon at the Laser Vaginal Rejuvination Institute of Los Angeles, says that airbrushed images of women in Playboy are examples of what constitutes pretty labia and that none of the women featured in the magazine have excessively large labia. According to Dr. Matlock, “Women want to be tight…They don’t want sagging or loose labia.” He goes on that say that his patients often bring pornographic material to his office and say they want to look like what is on the page.
Despite what Dr. Matlock may say, a large labia is not viewed the same in all cultures. In Japan the condition of “winged-butterfly” (as it is known) is seen as attractive and a sexual delicacy. In North America however, a large labia is viewed as unsightly. Again, there is no such thing as “normal” when it comes to a woman’s genitals. Women need to become more acquainted with their nether regions. Betty Dodson, creator of Viva La Vulva, encourages women to take hand mirrors and look at their genitals—get up close and personal. Women are slapped in the face with the ideal vulva is supposed to be the four “S”s; smooth, simple, symmetrical and small. Everything is supposed to be tucked inside the labia majora like a nice, neat little package. No one is mentioning that vulvas are supposed to change in shape and size during puberty. Many women believe that their genitals are too dark, too big, or too hairy after comparing them to the pictures they are increasingly exposed to through the Internet.
So what is normal? Vulvas come in every size, shape and color imaginable. Remember that many of the most beautiful things in nature aren’t nipped , tucked, liposucked or airbrushed. So, give yourself and your vulva a break—you are normal and beautiful.
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Danielle DeSilvis is a blogger and sex-positive activist. She holds a Masters in Sexual Health Education and a Masters in Science. Danielle is currently teaching at the university level and pursuing her nursing degree specializing in women’s health. She blogs at The Boom Boom Blog.
